We should have affairs?

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Yes I am talking about love affairs in life and off course till you get married 🙂 after that have love affair only with your spouse ;).

Now how in god’s name can having a love affair be positive and good? Apart from the usuals…..

First and foremost it makes you competitive it makes you open and get rid of the shy you! Don’t get that look now oh! I am the introvert and creative type so this is not for me. Or I am the topper types so these things are a waste of time! Or I am the next Einstein so…

In today’s world or any, you need to be bold and showcase yourself to others. This single trait increases your chances of achieving success tremendously and its hard, its very very hard, to learn. So if you would have done that affair you would have face this problem on how to impress the others, how to talk to her/him or how to approach the first time. Bottomline is this is what is required to sell yourself to others.

And “Impressing others” comes in handy in every phase of your life, whether it’s getting into sports, landing on a better job, getting good promotion from your boss or looking to start business of your own, think of anything and you require others to support or get involve with you to get success….

So if you have had an affair or proposed someone and succeeded after trying to impress, you are one step ahead of others who consider themselves too creative to do anything about it!

Note: A big disclaimer these are my personal opinions, follow it with your own risks!

How does exercising affects us?

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I do not believe exercising is going to be any good, yes never! Sure playing sports is an exercise we use to do that in childhood and colleges but that was more to hang around with friends.

Who want to really become Tendulkar or Dhoni, rather can become, very few!

After some days once you get into earning bread, things get piled up and you are out of shape. Working day & night or watching movies or hanging around with friends is all you do, moreover if you have a family, kids then you are more pressed again time to do anything about it. And it looks more and more as a waste of time. Club this with stress and pressure at work, now you have a perfect life 🙂

With all this who wants to spend time running half an hour in morning or play some sports, forget it! Let’s send that mail first or I need to talk to my boss for some issues blah blah! Our mind keeps on babbling.
But wait something changed, yes it did. One day out of reading loads of books on failure/success, motivational & stress management, I read something to do with exercising easy way of managing all. Now how can that be? How can exercise help in these things? With still that notion I started initial walks for 15-20 minutes and try to keep that regular to half an hour now.

The impact was immediate. Here are some points which I observe and some borrowed from other reads:

  1. More ideas start coming and things were moving much faster because decision making was much faster.
  2. More risk orientation, earlier for anything  can find thousands reason not to do, but now with one single good reason you do it.
  3. No more sleep hours in office, yes afternoon cat nap was not required anymore, this is for those who steal a nap.
  4. Better management of expectations with others for others, yes with this you will be much more confident so you can communicate things much better with others and reap the benefits.

These are some of my immediate positive impacts after exercising, still I would say long way to go but some start….

Why we should NOT be in our Comfort Zone?

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People or rather successful people keep saying if you are in your comfort zone change something, jump up / down, do something different and get out of your comfort zone.

Sometimes we get fed up with this..the question is why? Why should we be out of our comfort zone or try to be in difficult situation?

To answer this lets ask have you compared yourself with others, i am sure you do, all of us do. You would have compared yourself with neighbours how slim he/she is or how your colleague suddenly raked huge money in startup or your friend got a dream job with big fat salary. Do you also want to be in this lists? Do you also want to be “Where the Magic Happens” place ?

I am sure the answer is yes, you aspire all these and think how lucky that person is, oh! he got it so easy;

But the truth is all of them would have struggled and have been out of their comfort zone in the areas they want to succeed. This is simple truth which we do not accept because its difficult to be out of your comfort zone.

So next time if you aspire to become someone, or dream a big promotion or big car or “Be where the Magic Happens”, remember being out of comfort zone is prerequisite to being there…..

Difficult Conversations

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In your job or in a relationship you need to give negative feedback or have a difficult conversation on something you want the other person to change or improve on. We keep avoiding them for the fear of damaging our relationship or it backfiring on us making the situation worse.

However postponing it never works, leading to a much worse problem later for both you and the other person. Here are some of the simple and practical rules, to biting the bullet:

Have the discussion as soon as possible: The more you delay the conversation the more difficult it becomes. Imagine yourself in other person’s place; the earlier you know your mistakes, the easier it is to learn and improve it. But as more time elapses you are committed to the mistake and hence want to justify it. Same is true for the other person.

Accept that the other person may not be happy: Nobody likes unfavorable feedback. But remember the bigger picture, the feedback is for their own good, so don’t sugar coat and get diverted with what’s important. Make them understand it’s for their own improvement and growth.

Clear content with facts: Let your words do your work for you. Say what you mean. Imagine that you are a child storyteller and that it’s important that person understand you. If your counterpart distorts what you say, repeat it just as you said it the first time. Write it down with actual facts and dates, do not improvise while discussing. In case if new facts come up, you should pause and reschedule it for later discussion but stick to a script.

Polite but firm word phrasing: There are lots of different ways to say what you have to say. Some are temperate; some baldly provoke your counterpart with loaded language. If your counterpart dismisses, resists, or throws back your words, he’s not likely to hold onto your content — so choose your words carefully.

Neutral tone: Tone is the non-verbal part of the message you’re delivering. It’s the inflection in your voice, your facial expressions, and your conscious and unconscious body language. These carry emotional weight in a difficult conversation. It’s hard to use a neutral tone when your emotions are running high. That’s why you need to practice it ahead of time, rehearse it if possible.

Go ahead use the above rules and ease your “Difficult Conversations”…

Fearful people are the most imaginative people…

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I was talking to my son, he is very scared of going into dark places alone.. i was telling him everyone is friend of human beings, so why is he is scared? He said: I feel that suddenly there will be a shark in bathroom, shark in bathroom really 🙂 it was hilarous.

He is one of the most imaginative kid i have seen, very observant and observe things very carefully and imbibes it. He almost sees shark when he imagines..

Fearfull people are most imaginative once for sure……

Busy Bee – Procrastination a great help :)

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All of us are always busy, we have umpteen things to do on daily basis. We complain ferociously that if we have time we could have…dont worry it is not again one productivity lectures 🙂

Procrastination is our best friend, yes delay all your usual works do something interesting, read something or watch a movie, read a novel, play with your kids, forget all the to do lists that you have. Build something interesting…

Follow your heart and mind to do something interesting that you like, this is a way of telling us that this is where you should be, not losts in some to do lists.

Overall i think this will lead to achieve more in life and be more productive. So procrastination is our friend keep it active with you 😀